Tofu scramble that does not taste sad

Tofu scramble has a bad reputation earned honestly. The standard version is wet, pale, seasoned with a pinch of turmeric and served as a moral obligation. It is possible to do considerably better with two changes, and neither of them is an ingredient.

The first is heat and patience: the tofu needs several minutes in a hot pan without constant stirring, so water leaves and some pieces catch and brown. The second is kala namak, an Indian black salt with a sulphurous smell that reads unmistakably as egg. A quarter teaspoon added off the heat does more than any other single ingredient here.

This is also the one recipe on the site that wants firm rather than extra-firm tofu. Some moisture is welcome in a scramble, and a very dry block gives you something dusty.

Ingredients

• 1 block (14 to 16 oz) firm tofu, drained and lightly pressed 10 minutes
• 2 tablespoons neutral oil or butter
• Half a small onion, diced
• Half a teaspoon of ground turmeric
• Half a teaspoon of garlic powder
• A quarter teaspoon of smoked paprika
• 3/4 teaspoon fine salt
• A quarter teaspoon of kala namak, added off the heat
• 2 tablespoons nutritional yeast
• 2 to 3 tablespoons unsweetened plant milk or water
• Black pepper and chopped chives, to finish

Kala namak is worth ordering if you are going to make this more than once. Without it the dish is a pleasant savory tofu crumble. With it, people who were not told what they were eating tend to assume eggs.

Method

1. Crumble. Press for ten minutes, then crumble by hand into uneven pieces, some pea-sized and some closer to a bite. Uniform crumbs give a mushy result, and the variation is what makes it read as scrambled.
2. Soften the onion. Oil in a wide pan over medium-high, onion for about three minutes until translucent at the edges.
3. Dry-fry the tofu. Add the crumbled tofu and cook five to six minutes, stirring only every minute or so. Let some pieces sit and catch. This step drives off water and is the difference between a scramble and a wet pile.
4. Season. Turmeric, garlic powder, smoked paprika and salt. Toss for a minute until the tofu is evenly yellow and the spices smell toasted rather than raw.
5. Make it creamy. Nutritional yeast, then plant milk a tablespoon at a time until it looks glossy instead of dry. About a minute.
6. Finish off the heat. Pan off the burner, then kala namak, black pepper and chives. Heat drives off its aroma, so it goes in last and never before.

Where it goes wrong

It was watery. Not enough time in step three, or the pan was too small. The tofu needs room and several minutes to lose its water.

It was dry and crumbly. Extra-firm tofu, or too long over heat. Use firm, and add the milk sooner.

The turmeric tasted bitter and raw. It went in with the liquid instead of into hot oil. Spices need a minute of dry heat to bloom.

No egg flavor. The kala namak went in while the pan was hot. It is volatile and burns off within seconds.

Additions worth making

Mushrooms, sliced and added with the onion, contribute a savory depth the base recipe lacks. Spinach stirred in at the end wilts in thirty seconds. Diced red pepper adds sweetness. Chopped tomato should go in last and briefly, since it releases water.

For a heartier version, add a handful of the smoky paprika tofu from an earlier batch. It behaves like a crumbled sausage against the softer scramble.

Serving and keeping

Toast, a breakfast burrito, a bowl with avocado and hot sauce, or on top of roasted potatoes. It reheats acceptably for two days in a pan with a splash of water, and badly in a microwave, which turns it rubbery.

It is also a decent way to use a block that is approaching the end of its life, since crumbling forgives a slightly soft texture that would show in cubes. The storage page covers how to tell when a block has actually turned.